FreeBird

The bird flies free! It is liberated from the brine. It was so cold last night outside that I knew it would be useless to let it "thaw" in its brine on the balcony -- it would have still been an ice cube today. So I brought it into the living room.

And lo and behold, it was still near freezing but completely thawed when I dumped the brine and washed the bird at noon or so. Then I put it on a rack and put it back, naked, on the balcony, where it remains (at 11:30 p.m.) and will remain till tomorrow, air-drying in Paradise with its 20 virgin turkeyesses while I anticipate how to cook it.

Meanwhile, the gravy! Yes, all afternoon I painstakingly made the gravy (all recipes to follow upon approval of the attending masses).

Stage one was the raw stage, with onions, herbs and broth.


Stage II (the whole process takes about three hours; I kid you not) was the straining and then making the roux.


Stage III was adding back the strained broth and lovingly stirring constantly (and I mean every second of every minute while watching Season II of Columbo and drinking beer -- highly recommended for making turkey gravy) for about 30 minutes. Then add white wine and hey presto! Another thirty minutes of constant stirring and



smooth as a slug of 1956 Laphroiag single-malt scotch.

Need I remind you: tomorrow is Crunch Day. My turkey (let's call him "Dindy" for no particular reason) tells me to say hello and that really, really, he's all right on the balcony. But he could use a sweater right about now. And maybe a slug of double-malt scotch.

(He really DOES look cold, doesn't he?)