Ai Yai Yai

I feel like shit. You know those days. Everything conspires to make you feel like shit. I JUST DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING.

Everything seems to be coming together to make me feel like shit. A job I'm not working on because it's turned ugly. A sore throat which really hurts when I eat anything, which isn't often. I just want to lie under the covers, get drunk and read a book.

Imagine this: the possibility of a job as a bass player on a cruise ship! See the fantasy: halcyon days as I lounge in my cabin or maybe poolside, a leisurely cocktail before I go on, a cool jazzy set or two and some bantering with the other musicians. Then, get off at midnight, have a few champagnes and admire the starry sky from a blanket-covered deck chair. Do it all again the next day.

The reality: a tiny holding cell on some heaving ship with no amenities at all, because you're just a galley slave. Forced to wake up at seven for "crew drill." Spend the rest of the day being shanghaied into moving chairs around in the "ballroom". Enduring days of rain, bad food and questionable water, working with underpaid and resentful assholes while being underpaid and resentful. Playing "My Way" yet again while despising the white-haired dancers and the moron musicians you're sitting next to. Having yet another conversation with someone who marks an "X" when they're required to provide a signature. Except they're YOUR BOSS.

You can see why I just want to hide under the blankets, now, can't you?