A Hate-Hate Relationship

I don't know why I got interested in food. I'm really not interested in food. I make a dish exquisitely, but just to make it. The power of being able to make it, to make it to the best of my ability; that's what is interesting to me. Making good food is possibly the most satisfying skills one can possess on Earth.

Being able to paint is good. Being able to play music is great. Being able to write is fantastic. Being able to design smart-bombs: wowie-zowie. But being able to make food gets instant, identifiable results. It's transient, so the result never lasts. You can't hang a recipe of the raspberry gnocchi you made yesterday on the wall, to be sampled at a later date. You see the food you made in the un-lying faces of the people who are eating it. You can NOT lie about food. You can't disguise your dislike for food not to your taste.

Your face, not even including the amount left on your plate, will betray you, every time. So the food I make and the eating of it by others has to be the most satisfying thing to ever do in the world, at least for me. But see, unfortunately for me, after it's created, I lose interest in it. I taste as I cook, but by the time it's done, I'm no longer hungry. But that's also the way I like it. I make it, others eat it.

These days, I challenge-cook. This means that I don't taste anything until the moment when it all goes out to the eaters. Just to see how sharp I am, or am not. Did I judge the amount of salt perfectly? Brine it for exactly the right length of time? Underdo it or overdo it? I basically cook blind and see what happens. A recipe just becomes a sketch upon which I shall elaborate, and each time I shall elaborate differently. Luckily, I am getting better and better at it -- deaf dumb and blind me and I swear I will still make you a good bolognese.

But at the end of it, I have no real interest on what I make.

That is why it is SO HARD to get interested by people like this.