Time

Time is obviously everywhere. It is really hard to imagine that once, there wasn’t any time. No, really. Before the Big Bang. At least, that’s what the eggheads with our tax dollars seem to theorize (and what is it with Stephen Hawking, anyway? He’s the watch that seems to keep on ticking; I think he’s a very cleverly built wax dummy made to speak through a robotic device by Microsoft. Or maybe Sony).

So, then, my question is, what was there if there wasn’t time? Huh? People sat in waiting rooms FOREVER? Isn’t that called Hell? What, everyone’s watch just didn’t work, no matter how many Moishe’s Jewelers you went to?

Just how did that work, the no time thing, Stephen et. al.? Can you, like, maybe duplicate that so I can sleep all day and nothing moves or makes any noises and doesn’t disturb me? And the Hydro bill never arrives?

Hey, they DO fuck with my time, like send it an hour back, an hour forward like they did recently (and I want to get those motherfuckers over here to PERSONALLY work all my electronic devices) but just how does NO TIME work?

Because I’m getting interested. If we can just stall Friday until a more convenient time I won’t have to go to Madame Toledano and buy some kosher stuff for Brigitte’s mother.

Hey! I have an idea! I can put that in THE FUTURE!

See? If I cans, even YOUSE can be a fizzicist.