Okay, I’ve had it. I’m not an engineer, and will never be one. But you practically need an engineering degree in order to figure out how to attach a high-definition television for the best possible output.
And it’s bloody expensive—still. The purchase of the TV is just the beginning.
In almost two weeks of researching how to install and set up a plasma TV, I’m not much closer (but my wallet’s a lot lighter) to understanding what’s going on.
What I do know is, it is definitely in the stereo manufacturers’ interest to keep us confused. That way, we buy more useless stuff in the hopes that it will make our TV look better.
Here’s what I’ve found out so far: number one, if you want the absolutely best possible picture, you have to buy an HDTV. Not an HDTV-ready or EDTV; it must be an HDTV. (Otherwise you’ll spend a year looking for the boxes that make it an HDTV.)
Number two, if you want the absolute best picture, you have to have HD programming (not just digital.) This involves buying a special box called an HD terminal, although curiously if you do a Web search for this you will find that most references to it are Canadian. That alone will set you back around $250 for the box. Subscribing will run you about $6/mo, at least in my case.
Fine. But now you want the TV on the wall. If it’s any bigger than 36 inches, you’re probably going to have to call a pro. I got one quote at $400 for installation of a 42” Plasma.
You will need a mounting bracket. These will run anywhere from $20-$100 online, but shipping will be a major blow.
They will most likely have to tear your wall apart. This is if your wall doesn’t have conveniently placed “studs” (metal or wooden pillars holding your house up.)
They will have to put in their own studs. And now is the time to decide how to hook up the TV. And God, is that difficult. You literally have about four choices: HDMI, which is 100% digital, component RGB, which is the next best thing, COMPOSITE RGB, which basically turns your TV back into an analogue TV, and coaxial, which is how your grandfather hooks up his TV.
Component and composite. Could they make it any more confusing? They both use RCA jacks. But are they made by RCA? Who knows. Do you need a special RCA jack to make it a component jack and not a composite jack? Do a search—I guarantee you will find precious little on the subject.
Then there’s S-Video. But there’s no S-Audio. And I haven’t even gotten around to the home-theater speaker system. How do you hook it up? How do you hook up your trusty VCR to be able to record from the cable box, yet still deliver a digital signal to the TV? Guess what? It’s not possible.
If they wanted to make this more complicated, they’d have to go to a lot of effort. Because it’s so complicated that I would prefer to train to be a thoracic surgeon rather than have to plow through all these acronyms and euphemisms.
Seriously: I repeat that I’m fairly well acquainted with technology, but this whole thing has been worse than a multiple root canal. All so I can watch Humphrey Bogart in all his 1950s splendour.
You have perfectly summed up why I've held off upgrading.
ReplyDeleteWell, to this technophile, the lower prices are just too hard to resist. My main TV at the moment is a 36" CRT . . . it takes up the entire corner of the living room and must weigh 300 lbs. The guy who delivered it blanched when I pointed to what I thought was a suitable stand for it (a do-it-yourself Ikea rollabout.)
ReplyDelete"My God," he said, "there's no way that will support this TV!" So I ended up buying a $300 stand for it. So even that was a bit of a nightmare.
No, at the end of it, I will have this enormous (but flat!) screen on my bedroom wall and an enormously flat wallet in my pocket.