1. Insomnia
2. Reasonably loud music
3. An addiction to the non-sounds of the night
4. White wine
5. Chocolate
6. A sleeping partner (that would be a partner who's sleeping! Get your minds out of the gutter!)
7. A joyous urge to see that the clock says 4:30
8. A joyous urge to see that the clock says 4:30 but suddenly realise it's P.M.
9. Midnight munchies when you had no appetite at dinner
10. Bat wings (optional)
11. (You know I always turn everything up to 11): That great big bed that you can't go to sleep on! Guess what: you're never going to be satisfied until you have a coffin! Then finally you'll get a good day's sleep.
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